I have encountered a fair number of new clients or friends who get upset when I talk about being in control of your own life.  Like, really upset.

In fact, one person called me out on it pretty harshly.  I’m okay with that.  I’ve found the blessing in this. When someone calls you out on your beliefs you have a choice to make it work for you or get really upset and defensive.

You see, it can cause you to really look deeply at your own beliefs.  That can be uncomfortable and difficult, but if you follow it down, it can be really rewarding and in this case bring about a strengthening of them and a deeper understanding.

People get upset because they can’t either see what I mean by it, or deep down it scare the shit of out them.

You see, they were upset because I said that ‘people create their life with their OWN actions and thoughts’.

This person slammed down the point that life happens and we can’t control what others do to us and around us.  “Look all the people who lost their houses, jobs and had their life crumble” He said.  “You’re blaming THEM?”

I totally get it …because they are right.  Completely right.

He was angry at me with righteous indignation on his part with the understanding that he had.  I kind of admired him for that actually.  A real stand-up guy if you think about it -he was truly wanted to talk to understand – I can work with that!

There was a part of this idea that he was missing.

He was totally right – but it’s not about blaming or finding fault. The truth is we often can’t control the experiences we have in life.  We might lose our job and income through no fault of our own.  Accidents happen (tell me about it!) that can destroy our life as we know it, and so on.

However, we can control how we experience those circumstances.  We ultimately choose our reactions.  Oh sure sometimes we have immediate reactions that are based more on baser emotions, but we can calm ourselves or feed that fire.

I know people who allow petty annoyances to create a huge amount of chaos in their life.  I also know people who have had great tragedy befall them and who have chosen to create something positive out of it.

Make no mistake – these are choices that have been made. Choices based on mindset, experiences, beliefs and purpose.

You can choose to let life happen TO you, or you can take the controls and begin to create a life that reflects who you are and who you want to be and make life happen FOR you.

So let me be clear here.  You may not be able to control WHAT experiences you have in life – but you can control HOW you experience them. 

In this coming New Year I want you to consider that. This is a fresh year that can allow us a perfect time to begin to make shifts to bring about a happier, more vibrant life.

You deserve it, you are worthy of it and you can have it.

Big love,

Bonnie

PS Why not start the year off right by doing the clicky thing and joining me in my Facebook community?